I have a confession to make. I have been having an affair, for the last three years. My most recent conquest was a long lost love I was hoping to fill the void my Swiss lover left... Impossible.
The (real) man of my dreams (at least my fantasies) lives 6,000 miles away in Switzerland. We met in Spain on vacation and a transcontinental love affair ensued over the last three years. I was loyal the whole time we were together. I have to admit, I was totally in love, with the man and the myth. The whole tragically romantic love affair divided by time and space resonated deep within the little girl in me that always wants what she can not have.
When we meet it is intensely romantic and fiercely real. As he puts it, we go from 0-100 all at once. We are faced with loving the person we have gotten to know the old fashion way, through talking over many months without the modern conveinence of love making, while at the same time adjusting to the relationship strains of something as simple as just getting ready to go out at the same time, sharing the same space. I know in my heart I love him, time and distance has proved that is true. I fear reality is too harsh to nurture my dreams and even if one of us were willing to throw our lives as we know it off the cliffs and move in with the other, could it really work? Am I capable of loving someone completely? Or am I cursed to be in love with one fantasy after another, never able to bridge the gap between fact and fiction?
